This Web App Creates Random Camera Company Marketing Jargon

by admin April 16, 2017 at 5:13 am

When camera companies announce new cameras or lenses, the press releases are often filled with generic statements about the wonderful qualities of the product. Now the marketing teams behind those words have a new shortcut: the Random Photo Marketing Generator.

The humorous tongue-in-cheek web app is the creation of Lens Rentals founder Roger Cicala and software developer Seb Pearce. It all started when Cicala realized that camera corp press releases were all so similar that they might as well have been automatically generated.

“Today’s photography marketing blurbs were so boring they might as well be generated by a computer,” Cicala writes. “Basically, I collected a bunch of over used adjectives and phrases and Seb designed an engine to string them together fairly randomly. Then we threw in a bit of extra verbiage that I just thought should be there as Easter Eggs.”

Here are some randomly generated gear marketing we got from the helpful app:

Catch an instant and make it someone’s revenue generator forever. Designed with the outdoor photographer in mind, our newest lens provides the aberration control needed to take your photography to new heights. Bringing the full force of our breakthrough technology, scientific knowledge, applied automation, and years of experience to bear, we have created a lens that can create images that even Roger will approve of. We have created a game-changing new era in photography that will dramatically improve your workflow. Our newest industry-leading face detection algorithms provide you more capability then you’ve ever experienced.

We have created a breathtaking new standard in photography that will amazingly improve your workflow. Own an instant and make it the world’s possession forever. We’ve achieved this amazing performance at a price that is reasonable. Capable of capturing every scene in its full splendor, even when lighting is not ideal, its high-quality design and resilient build quality will make it your most treasured lens. This will make an impressive complement to any photographer’s armamentarium providing a most useful lens for everyday and architectural photography.

Designed with the pet photographer in mind, our newest lens provides the edge-to-edge performance needed to take your photography to the next level. Offering perspective control while minimizing axial chromatic aberration and distortion, this lens offers the clarity required by today’s high-resolution cameras. We have created a breathtaking new benchmark in photography that will dramatically improve your capabilities. Color Fringing and Flare are so well controlled as to be virtually non-existent. Using alien technology including multiple aspheric elements and the industry’s quietest autofocus system, this lens can take your artistic expression to new achievements.

Like all of our products, this lens is in a class of its own. See the world with a dramatic perspective you never knew was possible. We have united intuitive control with masterful control to provide you a singular experience. Now you can possess a single zoom lens that coaxes you to seize images that are both brilliant and impressive. Capable of capturing every scene in its full natural brilliance, even when weather is not ideal, its high-quality design and tank-like build quality will make it your most treasured lens.

Capture life in a way you’ve always wished you could. Distortion and Aberrations are so well controlled as to be virtually non-existent. We’ve achieved this amazing performance at a price that is competitive. We are pleased to offer the world’s finest wide-angle lens, featuring 4 extra low dispersion elements, 2 aspheric elements, and our new molecular coatings providing unparalleled flare resistance while providing creamy bokeh. Own an instant and make it your memory forever.

Using alien technology including multiple low dispersion elements and the industry’s most accurate autofocus system, this lens can take your professional performance to new levels. Like all of our products, this lens demonstrates your commitment to your craft. This lens provides a wide ranging focal length, offering a unique opportunity to enhance your natural creativity. Capture the moment in a way you’ve always wished you could. Designed for the dedicated professional, it offers the look and feel most only wish for, at a price that most can’t afford.

Offering perspective control while minimizing axial chromatic aberration and distortion, this lens offers the clarity required by today’s high-resolution Facebook pages. This is a new advance that will forever change your craft and create new opportunities in your imaging world. This will make an impressive complement to any photographer’s armamentarium providing a workhorse lens for portrait and architectural photography. Our recently developed industry-leading face detection algorithms provide you more adaptability then you’ve ever experienced. Like all of our products, this lens demonstrates your commitment to your craft.

If you’re a photo company thinking of cutting costs in your marketing department (or if you’re a photographer looking for a chuckle), check out the Random Photo Marketing Generator.

“Click on Generate and see what you get,” says Cicala. “It might be amusing, or it might be almost indistinguishable from a manufacturer’s website.”

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